So background info. Have had to have more teeth removed and have what are called flappers. (temp. partials) I was so excited about having the front tooth that they had to take back in place and was looking forward to a good meal rather than soups, gravy and the soft foods that I have been living on since surgery. To my utter horror and dismay, I can not wear the top partial. It goes to far back in my mouth causing my gag reflex to kick in over time. I have been trying to work my way through it by putting it in until I gag and then take it out wait a few moments then do it all again. So far I can keep it in for 10 seconds. (No wonder i never could give good head) They tell me that once I get the regualar one it will not go against the roof of my mouth. Here's hoping I don't have anymore problems or I will be shit out of luck since a full denture requires the plate to sit against the top of the roof of my mouth. Either than or hope I find a sugar daddy that will pay for implants!!!!
So as of now my self esteem is in the shitter cause I feel like a redneck woman and not the sexy type but the jeff foxworthy type.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
From Bad to worse in less than 1 day
Posted by Vixen at 8:03 PM 0 comments
Monday, July 20, 2009
So I have registered for classes this fall. They will be a lot harder than usual since I am taking them online. It is time to give the lifestyle one last go. I don't expect things to happen overnight, I finally reliazed that while I hate being alone, I need to learn that things come in time. (God I have never been pacient) I had tried to become a toy to a female the last year but, it didn't work out to well. Which to be truthful, it really didn't amount to anything just wishful thinking on my side I guess. She was obviously too busy for me. It was a hard blow and for a long time I blamed myself wondering what I had done wrong. I guess in the end she and I both were wrong. Me in trying to find a replacement and she in taking on an additional person when she didn't really have time for the first.
Some times I really want to give up and yet there is always a part of me that keeps hoping that there really is someone out there for me. 
Nickleback Gotta Be Somebody
This time I wonder what it feels like
To find the one in this life
The one we all dream of
But dreams just aren't enough
So I´ll be waiting for the real thing.
I know it by the feeling.
The moment when we´re meeting
Will play out like a scene straight off the silver screen
So I`ll be holdin' my breath
Right up to the end
Until that moment when
I find the one that I spend forever with
`Cause nobody wants to be the last one there.
'Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares.
Someone to love with my life in their hands.
There`s gotta be somebody for me like that.
`Cause nobody wants to go it on their own
And everyone wants to know they´re not alone.
Somebody else that feels the same somewhere.
There`s gotta be somebody for me out there.
Tonight out on the street out in the moonlight
And damn it this feels too right
It´s just like Déjà Vu
Me standin' here with you
So I´ll be holdin`my breath
Could this be the end?
Is it that moment when
I find the one that I spend forever with?
‘Cause nobody wants to be the last one there
'Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares.
Someone to love with my life in their hands.
There´s gotta be somebody for me like that.
`Cause nobody wants to go it on their own
And everyone wants to know they´re not alone.
Is there somebody else that feels the same somewhere?
There`s gotta be somebody for me out there.
You can´t give up!
Lookin´ for that diamond in the rough
Because you never know when it shows up
Make sure you´re holdin` on
‘Cause it could be the one, the one you´re waiting on
‘Cause nobody wants to be the last one there.
'Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares.
Someone to love with my life in their hands.
There has gotta be somebody for me
Ohhhhhh.
Nobody wants to go it on their own
And everyone wants to know they´re not alone.
Is there somebody else that feels the same somewhere?
There `s gotta be somebody for me out there.
Nobody wants to be the last one there
And everyone wants to feel like someone cares.
Is there somebody else that feels the same somewhere?
There has gotta be somebody for me out there.
From http://www.6lyrics.com
Posted by Vixen at 2:20 AM 0 comments
Sunday, July 19, 2009
So, It has been awhile. I have had another surgery and am healing quite well. (thanks to those people who kept in touch) I have decided to take this blog to a different level. I want to discuss things. I want to talk about everything from normal day to day activities and subjects that no one else seems to want to discuss. So for the first topic I wish to discuss FRIENDS. What are friends? According to Websters online Dictionary a friends is the following
1 a: one attached to another by affection or esteem b: acquaintance
2 a: one that is not hostile b: one that is of the same nation, party, or group
3: one that favors or promotes something (as a charity)
4: a favored companion
Okay lets start with number 1a. thats sounds good we become friends because we are attracted to another person. b. because we know this person.
Looking at number 2. while it is what a friend is it is more of an attitude such as he or she gets along with me. b. this is like saying England is our friend
Out of all of those number 1 is more of what we think of when we speak of a friend. But still, is that a true friend???? I recently had a friend who had not been on line in a few days. A mutual friend said that they were going to check on this friend and would let me know if that person was okay. The off line friend came pack on line on the 16 and I have yet to hear from that "so-called" friend who could havel let me know that the other person was online.
I guess I am just tired of those people who say they are your friend yet they never speak to you online and I have to always be the one to speak first. When all is said and do are they really my friends? What do you think do you have people or friends like.
Posted by Vixen at 12:17 AM 0 comments
Saturday, March 7, 2009
It has been a very long time since I have taken the time to post. I am still having medical problems and am working more and more toward getting well. A lot has changed in my life. I no longer cling to the hope that things will ever work out between me and a certain person. I have moved on and have found a couple of gentlemen that interest me. One I have been in constant contact with, the other comes and goes. (typical male) While the one I talk to just about every night is very nice and he does excite me to a point, it is the one that doesn't get on line much that drives me to distraction. He is real time and has many of the same interests that I have and is an expert in some of the things that I am curious about. I am changing things about me daily and for the better. While I am still unwell, yet, I get stronger daily. Like the heart above my feelings for a certain person will slowly fade. While the dreams of becoming more than a sub/slave to a certain individual might be dashed against the rocks, I know that out there somewhere is the one who will be what I need just as I will be what he seeks.
I have only 8 more weeks and I will be done with all my core classes in school and then will only have a few electives to do then I will graduate. But, it doesn't end there for I have chosen to continue on. I will have an associates in Contemporary Management and hopefully that will get me a job where I can work a set schedule so that I can go back and get my accounting degree.
So that is where I stand at the moment. A little sickly but getting emotionally stronger each day
Posted by Vixen at 8:19 PM 0 comments
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Looking for someone to play with
First off let me start by saying my sex drive is back and in full force. Maybe I am trying to make up for lost time? The only problem I am having is trying to find someone to play with. Maybe I am just being to choosy now after a bad situation. I have had quite a few offers and even took up an offer or two, but they seem to be what I am looking for. Maybe it's the intimacy that I miss, the feeling of being a valued partner. I thought about going back into the gorean scene but not sure if that would work. I have recently been reading a great deal of Vampire books and am finding myself very interested. Love the Charlene Harris books with Sookie and Bill. Sherrilyn Kenyon and her Carpathian series are also great. I just finished Rouge Hunter by Lynsay Sands. I have no idea why but I have always like these type books. I love Laurel K Hamilton and her Anita Blake series and also her Merry Gentry series. The Merry series is filled with sex and darkness. What is your favorite Psychic book?
Posted by Vixen at 2:15 AM 2 comments
Monday, October 27, 2008

Okay I too have been tagged so here goes.
The Rules:
* Link to your tagger and list these rules on your blog.
* Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog - some random, some weird.
* Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blog.
* Let them know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
1. I am a Nerd Fighter (want to know what it is check out the Urban Dictionary http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Nerdfighter)
2. I am 42 and have a crush on Chad Kroeger from Nickleback.
3. I voted for Barrack Obama (hows that for random)
4. After coming out of a relationship where I slept with my hands tied to my headboard. I still find my hands holding on to the bed post when I wake up in the mornings.
5. I almost moved to PA (was going to be a surprise, glad I didn't now lol)
6. My favorite part of Boston Legal is the ending where James Spader and William Shatner are sitting on the balcony smoking cigars and drinking scotch.
7. I am a avid Ghost Hunter and feel that Jason Hawes and Grant Wilson should run for president.
People I am tagging
Calais she tagged me first
notperfect2020
Marie
Miss Honey
The Enchanted Submissive
yes I didn't do all 7 so tie me and spank me (maybe that's why I didn't do it lol)
Posted by Vixen at 11:51 PM 0 comments
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Working For The Boss
________________________________________
With the work day done she leans back in her chair and closes her eyes to think about the vacation she just had. Her eyes close and a grin appears upon her face as her thoughts drift to that one encounter that lead up to the weekend of a life time.
She just arriving she places her suitcase in room when her cell phone rings. “Hey how the hell are you.” The voice on the other end causes her eyes to light up and a smile to appear on her face. “Sure I would love to get together with you, yes it has been a long time, OK eight it is, see you then.”
Closing the phone she walks over to the mirror and looks at herself, running her hands over her body she hopes that he will notice the improvements she has made. The last time he saw her she was a large curvy woman and now with the recent weight loss and the long strenuous hours in the gym she has become something that men and women tend to take notice of.
With deliberate movements she heads back to the suitcase and begins to unpack. When she is done with the unpacking she looks at the cloths and things maybe something very feminine is best for tonight. With deliberation she chooses the black dress with the plunging v neck to wear. Smiling she remembers the day she brought it. It was the main motivation for her while she was struggling with her weight loss.
Hanging it up she moves to the undergarments, deciding against a bra she picks out the black lace panties and matching garter belt and then unrolls the sheer stockings. Laying them on the bed she turns on the television finding a station playing music and heads toward the bathroom.
Pulling back the shower curtain she turns on the hot water and begins to remove her cloths. Unzipping the skirt she lets if fall to the floor in careless abandon and then kicking off her heels she runs her hands over her legs, gone are the pudgy thighs, replaced with slender thighs. Moving up she unfastens the stockings from the garter belt and slowly rolling one down then rolling down the other, her breath becoming a bit heavy. Placing the stockings aside she unfastens the garter belt and sits it atop the stockings. Unbuttoning the silk blouse she moans softly as the material glides down and pools down at her feet. Gathering up the blouse she lays it aside and removes her bra and panties and then slips into the shower.
Standing there in the shower she begins to soap herself up lingering over her nipples and pinching them. Her moaning becoming more and more frequent, reaching up she takes the shower massage handle and moves it over her body letting the water pound upon her hardened nipples. Then with urgency she moves it between her legs letting it spray directly upon her clit.
Her head falls back and her eyes close in abandon as the spray causes the tiny clit to swell, taking a finger she inserts it into her and moves it in and out while the spray continues to cause her clit to become engorged. Just on the brink of climax she stops. Reaching once again for the soap she finishes washing up and turning the water off she steps out of the shower.
After having dried her body and hair she begins to carefully apply her makeup. Sitting on the edge of the bed she slowly pulls on her panties taking a moment to stroke her swollen clit. Then fastening the garter belt she slips her legs into the stockings and pulls them up and fastens them. Standing in front of the mirror she surveys her appearance and wonders how things will proceed tonight and if all she is doing will be in vain.
Forgoing the bra she slips the black dress on and fastens the chains that dangle down the plunging neck of the dress. Slipping on her black heels she fastens the ankle cuff and smiles at the tiny handcuffs that accent the cuff. Taking one last look in the mirror she grins knowing damn well she looks good. Grabbing her leather coat and purse she heads out the room and down to the lobby of the hotel.
As she enters the lobby she sees him and wonders if he has seen her. Oh yes, he has seen her alright his eyes rack over her body and he gives her a smile then turns his head back to the elevator. She laughs to herself, he defiantly noticed her but doesn’t realize that it’s her he is waiting on.
Deciding to play on this knowing that he loves a good joke, she makes her way over to him and smiles. “Excuse me but could you help me please?” He turns to her and his eyes dance over her body taking special notice of the cleavage that the chains accent and then stares at the shoes.
“Damn girl you have changed” he says. She laughs softly “What gave it away.” His eyes gaze lingering on her shoes “the handcuffs. I remember you always did love them.” They smile at each other and head out the door.
After dinner they head to a special club that he had told her about. “You sure you want to go to this club?” She smiles and nods unable to speak due to the excitement that is building inside of her. He talks to the man at the door and they both move in. He smiles at her as he notices the looks she is getting looks from both the men and the women in the club.
Sitting down at a table he introduces her to some of his friends. As he heads to the bar to get drinks, the woman she just met, Tracy, moves closer and smiles “You are new at this aren’t you?” she asks. “A bit, I have never been to a club like this before but I am not that new at what goes on.” Tracy smiles,” yes but I know you are new at some of this, he has been very upfront on what can and can’t be done.”
He arrives back at the table and grins “so you and Tracy are getting to know each other. That’s great Cheri I want to make sure that you are OK with this.” Cheri smiles at him a soft rosy glow on her cheeks lets him know that she is a bit embarrassed. He leans over and whispers “any time you feel that something is too much you know what to do right?” She whispers “blue” and he nods and they rise and head to a back room reserved for them.
The room is filled with candles and the smell of roses fills the room. David turns back the bed that is in the middle and the stark white sheets are covered in red rose petals. She smiles softly “you do remember.”
He walks over and runs his hands over her shoulders taking in the feel of the creamy soft skin. He moves her over to the bed and as they sit down he beings to kiss her softly then more intense. Breathlessly she moves back on the bed laying down as his hands move up and down over her. Once more he asks” are you sure you’re ready for this.” With a soft whimper she says “yes before I lose my nerve.”
He removes her dress running his hands over the panties noticing the damp spot. Moving his fingers over the dampness he whispers “you have been a bit naughty haven’t you” she just nods her head her eyes glued to his. He softly pats the wetness and chuckles “looking forward to it haven’t you.”
Then with a long stroke he draws his hand back and smacks her wet crotch. Her eyes widen and her body starts to shiver. He takes a knife and cuts the sides of her panties and pulls them away exposing her mound bare except for a small circular tuft of hair. Placing the panties over her face he leans down and whispers “ last chance to back out “
Her eyes catch his and she stares, her voice coming in a husky whisper “ please” That’s all it takes he goes over opens a drawer and pulls out a feather and begins to leisurely run it over her body carefully stroking her nipples until the become hard as tiny pebbles. Reaching down he pulls on one and twists it. “You always did like this didn’t you my pet.” Moving to the other he pinches it hard pulling it “You always were a slut in bed, such a lady in public what would people think if they could see you now” he leans over her and takes a leather restraint and buckles her wrist in place then does the same to the other wrist. “mmmmmmm you always did like to be held in place”
He then moves to her legs and pulls them wide apart causing her mound to open up and expose her swollen clit. Locking each leg into its own restraint he smiles seeing the reactions it is having up on her body as her clit begins to glisten with her body’s juices. “You always were such a naughty one so over sexed with no one to take care of it” he reaches down and rubs her clit as she moans softly. Then with a swift movement he smacks her clit.
She withers upon the bed the restraints holding her in place. He takes a blindfold from the drawer and places it over her head and down over her eyes making sure it is held firmly in place then begins to suckle her nipples as she whispers “please” once more he beings to move his hands over her body as he tenderly bites each nipple.
He begins to stroke her clit softly the more firmly each stroke becoming harder and harder as her juices begin to wet his fingers. She moans as one of his fingers slides in between the glistening lips to slowly snake its way into her pussy. Resting his thumb upon her clit and inserting another finger he begins to rub and wiggle as her hips begin to move.
Slowly the door opens and Tracy comes in David nods at her and she closes the door and moves forward taking one of Cheri’s nipples in her mouth. Feeling the mouth upon her nipples Cheri struggles for a moment until David begins rubbing her clit again and then she is lost to the sensations that are coursing though her body.
Tracy moves down her body and then replaces David’s thumb with her tongue. David moves away to see if Cheri is doing OK and then stands back watching as Tracy laps up the juices that are beginning to trickle from Cheri’s pussy. Moaning she pulls the lips wider and sinks her tongue deep into Cheri’s pussy. David removes his shirt and pants and begins to stroke his hard cock his eyes watching Cheri’s body move.
Tracy reaches over and takes a toy dildo from the drawer and slides it deeply into Cheri’s clinching pussy. Each stroke starting slow then building until each stroke becomes harder and faster plundering in between Cheri’s thighs, until Cheri’s body begins to buck under the fast hard fucking she is receiving.
Taking off her cloths Tracy places the dildo into the harness she was wearing underneath and slides on top. Grabbing Cheri’s ass she lifts it as she begins to thrust in deeply. Cheri’s cry’s of pleasure becoming more and more intense as her body bucks as Tracy pulls out to the tip and then rams home again. As the first wave of orgasm rolls over Cheri ,Tracy smiles at David and picking up her cloths she heads out of the room dildo still attached to find her girlfriend.
David removes the blind fold and smiles at Cheri. “Done or do you want more” With a ragged voice she whispers “more” David pulls out a vibe from the drawer and tapes it over so that it fits snuggly against her clit and turns it on low. Unfastening her he moves her so that her ass is in perfect position and then fastens her back down. Turning up the vibe up just a tad, he moves in front of her face and pushes his cock into her mouth.
“Suck it you dirty little slut I know you want to” She slides her mouth down over him as he gasps in amazement that she takes him all in. “You dirty whore you have been practicing haven’t you” she nods as she slides up and down his rock hard cock. Then suddenly with a gasp she feels him grab her hair in his hands and feels him start to fuck her mouth.
Deeper and faster he moves with strong hard strokes until she feels him shudder against her as she begins to swallow his load suckling until he is dry. “That’s it, lap it up don’t you dare waste a drop keep my cock hard and wet because I am going to fuck your ass.”
Pulling away he moves behind her pulling open her ass cheeks and placing the tip right at the entrance. Her body tightens as he begins to easy his way in her ass opening to the onslaught of his hard cock. As he buries himself in deeply and begins to pull out he turns up the vibe until her body is rocking with the force of his thrusts into her tight ass. She cries out as waves and waves of pleasure roll over her and his voice filling her head as he smacks her ass and tells her what a dirty little slut she is.
“You like taking my cock in your ass don’t you little whore,” harder and harder he pounds until he is buried and lets go filling her ass with cum. Her body spasms as she squirts causing the sheets to become soaked. He pulls out and walks to the front pulling her head up to look at him. “You love being fucked like this don’t you slut” he walks back behind her and takes his belt and begins to strike her ass cheeks until they are red. This time he flips her over causing the restraints to pull at her tightening harder as he start fucking her soaked pussy the vibe still attached sending pulsating waves of pleasure through both him and her.
“You fucking slut!” He yells at her as the walls of her pussy close over him making it extremely tight his hand grab her ass as he lifts it up to met his thrusts. Faster and harder until he collapses on top of her, a shy smile comes to her lips as she looks at him and before they both fall asleep she whispers “tomorrow please”
She jerks to awareness as she hears the door open. “Sleeping on the job Cheri?” her boss asks. “Nope, just sitting back thinking” she reaches over and takes the finished paper out of the typewriter. “Actually the story is finished and was wondering what the next assignment will be.” With a smile upon his face David grins. “Oh, I am sure I can come up with something”
Posted by Vixen at 10:41 PM 3 comments
